[it's not the first time she's felt a sting of disappointment when he doesn't call her by her name, but it's the first time he'll be able to feel it, because she's not very good at keeping how she feels off her face but she's taken great pains not to let that show.
he calls nearly everyone lady. there are only a few exceptions, and--
no, no, no, this is not the time to be feeling jealous. her cheeks flush, and for a moment, she almost regrets bringing it up.
maybe it would have been better not go say anything at all.]
...I, um. I heard from Lili that... that, um, the two of you were feeling what... each other felt, that night. Was...
[ ah. he feels the disappointment first, which sets off an initial moment of stress and worry, the hint of self deprecation growing a little. what did he say? what did he do?? of course, he managed to upset her somehow, maybe she didn't want to talk about it at all...
he has absolutely no idea what could have caused that, either, but, luckily, flayn asks. and... ah. he's a little surprised, it feels like? but then, the embarrassment takes over, and he exhales on a bit of a laugh. it feels a bit silly, in retrospect. ]
...that was why I was embarrassed. When - you thought I had a fever. I was trying to get a handle on it. Lady Lili was...is... very emotional. [ he was really panicking trying not to show any of that. she apparently had a good night.
....so did he, though.
...wow. embarrassing. anyway. reaching up with his other hand, he rubs the back of his neck. his own emotions are starting to peek through again, embarrassment, rising, rising... ] ...but by the time I... we. [ he's dying. his feelings are even more obvious, now, the embarrassment like a tea kettle about to whistle right out of his ears. ] ... well, you know...
[ local man can't say the word "kissed"
ahem. he finishes softer. ] ...I... I certainly had a handle on it, by then.
[ ...so that was me. he doesn't finish the sentence, but it hangs pretty obviously in the air between them, and yin yu finally shifts his gaze to look out of the corner of his eye at flayn beside him to gauge her reaction. ]
[can't believe talking business is being delayed by all this het nonsense. anyway.
the stress and worry are strong, and it sends a shock of fear through her - which will, unfortunately, get broadcast right back to him. it's paired with a twinge of guilt - but it's quickly overshadowed by his embarrassment as he explains.
...
her heart flutters as he does - because talking about it makes her think back to that moment, and she can't help but feel intensely happy every time she does.
...that happiness is overcome by an outpouring of complete and utter relief when he says he'd already had a handle on things by the time she kissed him.]
I... I thought, perhaps, when I heard that, that you-- would not have wanted it, if you were not feeling what she was, or...
[she shakes her head, flustered beyond all reason.]
Or, it would be more accurate to say that I... worried about that.
[it meant so much to her. she wants desperately to believe that it meant something to him, too.]
it's a miracle he managed to stumble his way through that feeling flayn's emotions. the fear worried him, but... it ended well, and the relief is helpful for him, too. he doesn't wheeze out loud or anything but that was a very stressful few minutes. ]
No! No, no, I. [ aaaaaaa ] ...you had nothing to worry for. Rather, I thought it might have been the opposite...
[ ahhh... flayn will get it, too. his emotions are a little more blocked off, but it leaks through, still; there's a warmth there that must be happiness. even if he's embarrassed, he seems pretty gently pleased. that doesn't make his voice any louder or less shy when he confirms: ] ...that was. Why I asked.
[ to kiss her... aaaa...
silly. this is very silly. they're both silly. they will perhaps make a matched set of worriers, at this rate...although there are many things in this camp to be worried about, now aren't there.
really, though. if he wasn't feeling it himself, yin yu wouldn't believe this happiness of flayn's was because of him for even a second. ]
nothing to worry for. he'll feel a surge of warmth and affection and complete, utter relief at that, followed shortly by intense happiness. flayn could probably stand to learn a thing or two from him about staying calm.
if it was real, then...]
...I am glad, then - that I did not end up, um... taking advantage of you.
[ that intense happiness ends up tugging a smile on his face, too, and he looks down at their joined hands for a moment, at how easily their fingers fit together. it's fed back to her in this loop, less loud, but just as happy.
...and, his answer comes surprisingly quickly, with a wry little laugh. ]
Lady Flayn, I really don't think there's a way in the world you could be taking advantage of me.
[ like. really. he would do basically anything you asked a hundred times over and enjoy it. ]
[there's a very slight pang of disappointment, the moment he says "lady" - but the rest of what he says has her heart fluttering again, flustered but enamored.]
[ ?? ?? she was disappointed for a second there. it doesn't even really occur to him why, but it fades so quickly, and she looks so happy that it's - well, it's easy to forget about it, at least momentarily.
besides, he does mean it. it's probably pretty obvious by now, but... yin yu's a little gone, too. enamored is a good word for it. happy. his face hurts a little from how much he's been smiling this week. (it's like a decently normal amount for a normal person, but he is not a normal person.) ]
cheeks reddening again, flayn probably feels his surprise, and then the startled half laugh of nerves and also--there's that blush of happiness again. ] That ... would not trouble me at all, my lady.
[...gods, she wants to kiss him. there's another little bit of disappointment at "my lady," but. it's definitely overshadowed by the desire to kiss him, like, right now.]
...could you lean down, please?
[he's. so tall.
is she going to have to ask like this every time.]
...ah. [ oh.... right. not letting himself get too distracted. (??)
he huffs a little, nerves and embarrassment and anticipation, then bends over obediently as asked. flayn can surely feel his pleased jitters from their connection, too. ]
[her expression softens as he leans down. he does it so easily that it actually makes her a bit more relaxed - she can feel his nerves, but she can feel the anticipation, too, and there isn't really any hesitation in the way he leans down.
she goes up onto her tiptoes, her lips meeting his gently. there's no small amount of anticipation, and longing coming from her, but it's all wrapped up in an unmistakable fondness, tinged with the slightest bit of awed disbelief that this is actually happening.
[ their lips touch, and the feedback loop of emotions gets a little stronger. it’s a little pleased spark, and that same exact feeling of small, awed surprise. the fact that someone like her wants - likes something like this, with someone like him, is more incredible than he can bother to put into words. his emotions stir, warm and gentle, amazed.
he’s not sure what to do with his other hand. so, at first, it hovers a bit awkwardly between them, before he tentatively reaches up to cup her cheek. the touch is tender and gentle, thumb brushing the curve of her cheekbone, holding onto her like she’s the most precious thing in the world.
they are out in public; there will easily be other people around, so he won’t linger too long, but...just a little while longer. ]
flayn doesn't want to stop. she knows that they eventually have to - that she can't linger on the kiss forever, as much as she'd like to - but that isn't what she wants, so there's a twinge of reluctance just before she pulls away.
her expression is gentle, though, and as she catches her breath, she smiles up at him, her cheeks flushed and her heart practically singing.
she doesn't say a word. he can feel how she feels.]
[ initially, this emotion sharing thing had been a bit of a headache. but between dealing with lili’s on Saturday and this, right now—this unadulterated happiness and affection from they irl in front of him —makes it not so bad.
so, when flayn pulls back and gives him that smile, she gets the unguarded burst of warmth and happiness from him, too. it’s a little wobbly and creaky, because as ever yin yu has a bad handle on the positive parts of his emotions, but.. his hand lingers longer than the kiss itself, and he ducks his head, flushing to the tips of his ears, but smiling at her nonetheless. it’s boyish and flustered, but just as warm, too.
thats confirmation as any, on his end, too. is this what it feels like to be simply happy? how long has it been since he had something that made him feel this way? when was the last time he genuinely smiled, before flayn came around?
[it's a terrible invasion of privacy, really. flayn shouldn't be happy to be able to feel what he's feeling without any filters - what if there were something he was feeling that he didn't want to know about?
...but she can't help but be a little grateful, too, because this way, he knows exactly what she feels without her having to say a word, and there's no chance of him thinking she doesn't feel something that she does. it would have been one thing to say it (and she has, hasn't she? she's said so many times that she genuinely loves being around him), but this way, he can accept it without reservation.
she hopes, anyway.
with a smile, she leans into the lingering touch of his hand on her cheek. they probably shouldn't just stand here forever like a pair of lovestruck idiots (even if that's exactly what they are), but she doesn't seem at all inclined to step away.]
...thank you.
[for letting that happen. ...for feeling the same way as her.]
[ someone is going to see this!!! except psych this is in a pc.
but, lovestruck idiots is the right way to describe it. it's a little overwhelming, being hit with so many feelings of affection all at once, and his cheeks are starting to hurt because of the smile on his face, even if it's little. it's still more than he's smiled in centuries. ]
It feels like I should be the one thanking you, somehow, but... of course, my lady.
[ it's another couple of seconds before he finally pulls away, realizing that he's probably just made things a little more awkward than necessary just by manner of existing. sometimes he misses being someone who just doesn't exist. (he doesn't miss it that much, actually. he's a little flattered, and surprised by it every single time.)
tamping down a bit on that happy, sappy feeling, he pulls away a little more, proper, other hand still lingering in hers. ]
[there's that slight twinge of disappointment again - one of these days, she really hopes to hear him call her by her name. but it's tempered by the fact that he's still got his hand in hers, which is definitely more important than the fact that he keeps calling her by a title.
it feels a little formal, a little distant, but - the way he allows her to hold his hand is the opposite of distant.
for now, it's enough, and she smiles up at him.]
...you said that you did not have a destination in mind, but - was there something you wanted to talk about...? Was that why you came by?
[ hhh THERE IT IS AGAIN, he's not dumb, and yin yu mentally ponders over what he just did or said. there's a brief twitch of anxiety, muted, but when flayn gives him a little smile it ebbs to background noise. ]
...ah, yes. It's not anything of particular interest, but...our team won this week. Did you end up receiving anything for it? Lady Lili and I are trying to maintain a list of the effects of the items, for Saturday.
[ whatever anxiety or disappointment can be dealt with a little later. business is helpful, and he keeps the pace of their walk as they talk through it, the set of his shoulders relaxed, thumb sweeping gently over the side of her hand. ]
[he's not dumb, but flayn kind of is. she really ought to just tell him she wants him to call her by her name, but she also knows this is how he defaults to addressing people, so. she's just resolved to be disappointed until he feels comfortable enough to do so on his own.
(just talk about it, idiot.)
she nods to herself, though - that twitch of anxiety has her worried, but as he speaks, he'll get a general sense of admiration, twinged with just the slightest bit of... frustration? it's mainly directed at herself, though.
she wishes she could think of these things herself, instead of just following along with someone else's ideas. maybe she could be more helpful, then.]
Oh - yes. Mine was some sort of small doll with strange arms... it seeks out heat and, um, explodes, if I use it. I can show you when we get back, if you would like.
No, no, that's alright. [ he trusts her! so that's two of those... ] I received some sort of toy that allows me to cause someone pain for a day. No physical injuries or anything, but enough pain is hard to hide. I suppose if something were to happen, it would be useful, so I've been keeping it on my person.
[ with his free hand, he reaches into his pocket to show her the little toy. it's a tiny, pink game of operation. he has absolutely no idea that that's what it is but you know when you're old. ]
Both of the items I've received over the week have been fairly defensive. [ things he could use to protect others. the fall one could be useful in a break in... the temperature one, in case something went south.
he huffs, a little humorless sigh. ] I'm glad for it. [ he doesn't really need things to attack people because he doesn't... want to do that. at all. so thanks, benevolent powers that be (not). yin yu gives flayn a little smile. ] Thank you for sharing with me, my lady.
[these games are. weird. very weird. but if it can be useful, then...]
Take care to keep that hidden at the trial, please. If you can. [...] I do not know if being found in the possession of something that could only belong to a certain team would count as divulging your team publicly, and I do not wish to find out that it would the hard way.
["the hard way" being watching him suffer for it a la giyuu. if yin yu loses a limb, she will be very upset - in fact, she's already a little upset, just thinking about it. he'll feel that - the worry loop is hard to break, though once again - as he says "my lady" - there's that same, perhaps now-familiar, twinge of disappointment.
though that can perhaps be explained away by:]
I wish that the items we received for being in the lead for tasks were more defensive than they are. I do not like feeling as though we are being encouraged to... hurt people.
[ he also doesn't want to lose a limb? that sounds like quite the hindrance to protecting anyone. (and painful?? and bad for you?? yin yu?)
he pockets the toy again, putting it out of sight. flayn's right, of course. ] ...and I feel the same. Such are the rules that we're supposed to follow.
[ yin yu's thoughtful, his emotions a calm sea, as he considers their options. the likelihood that the rules of this game will change are slim, so they will all have to find a way to play by them, and still win. it's what they did before, more or less, by finding their 'mastermind'. there can only be one team standing... ] We all have to work together somehow to break it. If there was a way for us to be on the same 'team'... but who knows what that might be.
[there's no small amount of relief, there. if anything happened to yin yu... especially since lili already suspected him once...
well. anyway. she's trying not to let herself get carried away with her thoughts, because when she does, she can practically feel her mood dropping - and she doesn't want yin yu to have to deal with that. so she takes a breath to try and center herself.
(it's not altogether successful. she doesn't manage to stamp down on it entirely, but at least the anxiety and frustration and loathing she feels when she thinks about only one team winning and the rules are slightly more muted.)]
...there has to be some way. If there is not - I am not certain that most of us would be able to live with it, knowing that there are people we would not be able to save.
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fishingforcompliments) wrote2020-06-06 12:53 pm
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he calls nearly everyone lady. there are only a few exceptions, and--
no, no, no, this is not the time to be feeling jealous. her cheeks flush, and for a moment, she almost regrets bringing it up.
maybe it would have been better not go say anything at all.]
...I, um. I heard from Lili that... that, um, the two of you were feeling what... each other felt, that night. Was...
[she hesitates.]
...was that why you...?
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he has absolutely no idea what could have caused that, either, but, luckily, flayn asks. and... ah. he's a little surprised, it feels like? but then, the embarrassment takes over, and he exhales on a bit of a laugh. it feels a bit silly, in retrospect. ]
...that was why I was embarrassed. When - you thought I had a fever. I was trying to get a handle on it. Lady Lili was...is... very emotional. [ he was really panicking trying not to show any of that. she apparently had a good night.
....so did he, though.
...wow. embarrassing. anyway. reaching up with his other hand, he rubs the back of his neck. his own emotions are starting to peek through again, embarrassment, rising, rising... ] ...but by the time I... we. [ he's dying. his feelings are even more obvious, now, the embarrassment like a tea kettle about to whistle right out of his ears. ] ... well, you know...
[ local man can't say the word "kissed"
ahem. he finishes softer. ] ...I... I certainly had a handle on it, by then.
[ ...so that was me. he doesn't finish the sentence, but it hangs pretty obviously in the air between them, and yin yu finally shifts his gaze to look out of the corner of his eye at flayn beside him to gauge her reaction. ]
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the stress and worry are strong, and it sends a shock of fear through her - which will, unfortunately, get broadcast right back to him. it's paired with a twinge of guilt - but it's quickly overshadowed by his embarrassment as he explains.
...
her heart flutters as he does - because talking about it makes her think back to that moment, and she can't help but feel intensely happy every time she does.
...that happiness is overcome by an outpouring of complete and utter relief when he says he'd already had a handle on things by the time she kissed him.]
I... I thought, perhaps, when I heard that, that you-- would not have wanted it, if you were not feeling what she was, or...
[she shakes her head, flustered beyond all reason.]
Or, it would be more accurate to say that I... worried about that.
[it meant so much to her. she wants desperately to believe that it meant something to him, too.]
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it's a miracle he managed to stumble his way through that feeling flayn's emotions. the fear worried him, but... it ended well, and the relief is helpful for him, too. he doesn't wheeze out loud or anything but that was a very stressful few minutes. ]
No! No, no, I. [ aaaaaaa ] ...you had nothing to worry for. Rather, I thought it might have been the opposite...
[ ahhh... flayn will get it, too. his emotions are a little more blocked off, but it leaks through, still; there's a warmth there that must be happiness. even if he's embarrassed, he seems pretty gently pleased. that doesn't make his voice any louder or less shy when he confirms: ] ...that was. Why I asked.
[ to kiss her... aaaa...
silly. this is very silly. they're both silly. they will perhaps make a matched set of worriers, at this rate...although there are many things in this camp to be worried about, now aren't there.
really, though. if he wasn't feeling it himself, yin yu wouldn't believe this happiness of flayn's was because of him for even a second. ]
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nothing to worry for. he'll feel a surge of warmth and affection and complete, utter relief at that, followed shortly by intense happiness. flayn could probably stand to learn a thing or two from him about staying calm.
if it was real, then...]
...I am glad, then - that I did not end up, um... taking advantage of you.
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...and, his answer comes surprisingly quickly, with a wry little laugh. ]
Lady Flayn, I really don't think there's a way in the world you could be taking advantage of me.
[ like. really. he would do basically anything you asked a hundred times over and enjoy it. ]
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Ah... is that so?
[well, that's something to think about--
no, no it is not. that's embarrassing.]
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[ ?? ?? she was disappointed for a second there. it doesn't even really occur to him why, but it fades so quickly, and she looks so happy that it's - well, it's easy to forget about it, at least momentarily.
besides, he does mean it. it's probably pretty obvious by now, but... yin yu's a little gone, too. enamored is a good word for it. happy. his face hurts a little from how much he's been smiling this week. (it's like a decently normal amount for a normal person, but he is not a normal person.) ]
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[well. in that... in that case.
he'll feel a slight apprehension before she speaks, but then she forges ahead--]
If I wanted to kiss you again, then, that would not... trouble you?
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cheeks reddening again, flayn probably feels his surprise, and then the startled half laugh of nerves and also--there's that blush of happiness again. ] That ... would not trouble me at all, my lady.
[ no. no, that would be. that would be stellar. ]
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[...gods, she wants to kiss him. there's another little bit of disappointment at "my lady," but. it's definitely overshadowed by the desire to kiss him, like, right now.]
...could you lean down, please?
[he's. so tall.
is she going to have to ask like this every time.]
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he huffs a little, nerves and embarrassment and anticipation, then bends over obediently as asked. flayn can surely feel his pleased jitters from their connection, too. ]
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she goes up onto her tiptoes, her lips meeting his gently. there's no small amount of anticipation, and longing coming from her, but it's all wrapped up in an unmistakable fondness, tinged with the slightest bit of awed disbelief that this is actually happening.
she wouldn't trade it for the world.]
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he’s not sure what to do with his other hand. so, at first, it hovers a bit awkwardly between them, before he tentatively reaches up to cup her cheek. the touch is tender and gentle, thumb brushing the curve of her cheekbone, holding onto her like she’s the most precious thing in the world.
they are out in public; there will easily be other people around, so he won’t linger too long, but...just a little while longer. ]
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flayn doesn't want to stop. she knows that they eventually have to - that she can't linger on the kiss forever, as much as she'd like to - but that isn't what she wants, so there's a twinge of reluctance just before she pulls away.
her expression is gentle, though, and as she catches her breath, she smiles up at him, her cheeks flushed and her heart practically singing.
she doesn't say a word. he can feel how she feels.]
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so, when flayn pulls back and gives him that smile, she gets the unguarded burst of warmth and happiness from him, too. it’s a little wobbly and creaky, because as ever yin yu has a bad handle on the positive parts of his emotions, but.. his hand lingers longer than the kiss itself, and he ducks his head, flushing to the tips of his ears, but smiling at her nonetheless. it’s boyish and flustered, but just as warm, too.
thats confirmation as any, on his end, too. is this what it feels like to be simply happy? how long has it been since he had something that made him feel this way? when was the last time he genuinely smiled, before flayn came around?
what a nice change. ]
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...but she can't help but be a little grateful, too, because this way, he knows exactly what she feels without her having to say a word, and there's no chance of him thinking she doesn't feel something that she does. it would have been one thing to say it (and she has, hasn't she? she's said so many times that she genuinely loves being around him), but this way, he can accept it without reservation.
she hopes, anyway.
with a smile, she leans into the lingering touch of his hand on her cheek. they probably shouldn't just stand here forever like a pair of lovestruck idiots (even if that's exactly what they are), but she doesn't seem at all inclined to step away.]
...thank you.
[for letting that happen. ...for feeling the same way as her.]
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but, lovestruck idiots is the right way to describe it. it's a little overwhelming, being hit with so many feelings of affection all at once, and his cheeks are starting to hurt because of the smile on his face, even if it's little. it's still more than he's smiled in centuries. ]
It feels like I should be the one thanking you, somehow, but... of course, my lady.
[ it's another couple of seconds before he finally pulls away, realizing that he's probably just made things a little more awkward than necessary just by manner of existing. sometimes he misses being someone who just doesn't exist. (he doesn't miss it that much, actually. he's a little flattered, and surprised by it every single time.)
tamping down a bit on that happy, sappy feeling, he pulls away a little more, proper, other hand still lingering in hers. ]
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it feels a little formal, a little distant, but - the way he allows her to hold his hand is the opposite of distant.
for now, it's enough, and she smiles up at him.]
...you said that you did not have a destination in mind, but - was there something you wanted to talk about...? Was that why you came by?
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...ah, yes. It's not anything of particular interest, but...our team won this week. Did you end up receiving anything for it? Lady Lili and I are trying to maintain a list of the effects of the items, for Saturday.
[ whatever anxiety or disappointment can be dealt with a little later. business is helpful, and he keeps the pace of their walk as they talk through it, the set of his shoulders relaxed, thumb sweeping gently over the side of her hand. ]
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(just talk about it, idiot.)
she nods to herself, though - that twitch of anxiety has her worried, but as he speaks, he'll get a general sense of admiration, twinged with just the slightest bit of... frustration? it's mainly directed at herself, though.
she wishes she could think of these things herself, instead of just following along with someone else's ideas. maybe she could be more helpful, then.]
Oh - yes. Mine was some sort of small doll with strange arms... it seeks out heat and, um, explodes, if I use it. I can show you when we get back, if you would like.
[it's a heat-seeking sky dancer.]
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[ with his free hand, he reaches into his pocket to show her the little toy. it's a tiny, pink game of operation. he has absolutely no idea that that's what it is but you know when you're old. ]
Both of the items I've received over the week have been fairly defensive. [ things he could use to protect others. the fall one could be useful in a break in... the temperature one, in case something went south.
he huffs, a little humorless sigh. ] I'm glad for it. [ he doesn't really need things to attack people because he doesn't... want to do that. at all. so thanks, benevolent powers that be (not). yin yu gives flayn a little smile. ] Thank you for sharing with me, my lady.
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Take care to keep that hidden at the trial, please. If you can. [...] I do not know if being found in the possession of something that could only belong to a certain team would count as divulging your team publicly, and I do not wish to find out that it would the hard way.
["the hard way" being watching him suffer for it a la giyuu. if yin yu loses a limb, she will be very upset - in fact, she's already a little upset, just thinking about it. he'll feel that - the worry loop is hard to break, though once again - as he says "my lady" - there's that same, perhaps now-familiar, twinge of disappointment.
though that can perhaps be explained away by:]
I wish that the items we received for being in the lead for tasks were more defensive than they are. I do not like feeling as though we are being encouraged to... hurt people.
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[ he also doesn't want to lose a limb? that sounds like quite the hindrance to protecting anyone. (and painful?? and bad for you?? yin yu?)
he pockets the toy again, putting it out of sight. flayn's right, of course. ] ...and I feel the same. Such are the rules that we're supposed to follow.
[ yin yu's thoughtful, his emotions a calm sea, as he considers their options. the likelihood that the rules of this game will change are slim, so they will all have to find a way to play by them, and still win. it's what they did before, more or less, by finding their 'mastermind'. there can only be one team standing... ] We all have to work together somehow to break it. If there was a way for us to be on the same 'team'... but who knows what that might be.
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[there's no small amount of relief, there. if anything happened to yin yu... especially since lili already suspected him once...
well. anyway. she's trying not to let herself get carried away with her thoughts, because when she does, she can practically feel her mood dropping - and she doesn't want yin yu to have to deal with that. so she takes a breath to try and center herself.
(it's not altogether successful. she doesn't manage to stamp down on it entirely, but at least the anxiety and frustration and loathing she feels when she thinks about only one team winning and the rules are slightly more muted.)]
...there has to be some way. If there is not - I am not certain that most of us would be able to live with it, knowing that there are people we would not be able to save.
[she knows she couldn't.]
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